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Relational Serendipity

              For a long time, I have appreciated the word, serendipity.  Happy surprises is a good way to understand serendipity.  I like to think that serendipity is always a good deal, so I welcome it.  It is different from luck, which can go both ways, as we know.  Serendipity is a form of grace, as I see it.  It comes unbeckoned.  You don’t plan or scheme for it.  You cannot make it happen.  All you can do is respond to it and appreciate it.  I cringe at how often I must have missed it because I was too busy or preoccupied.  I suspect much of the contemplative way of being spiritual is learning to be aware of and appreciate serendipity.

            Recently serendipity visited me again.  As often is the case, I did not actually know what was given to me.  Its origin was very simple.  I had published a short article, which is a nice experience in and of itself.  It is always affirming when someone says yes to sharing some of my words with the public.  It was a decently done piece of work, but not prize-winning.  A couple of my colleagues knew it had been published and nodded with the obligatory, “good job” comment.  And that’s about the extent of the matter.  In most cases, I have no clue who might even read it, much less what they might think about it.

            However, it was not the end of it.  An email appeared one day from a name I did not recognize.  The inbox said something like, “heartfelt thanks.”  If that is not invitational, I am not sure what is.  I doubt I was as careful as I should have been about it being possibly nefarious bug waiting to infest my computer.  I opened it and began to read some words from someone I do not know.  I was being complimented on the article.  The reader clearly had read it and also knew something about the subject matter of the article itself.  That in itself is a gift.

            But that is not the best part.  I replied expressing my gratitude for her words.  It was an email that had been crafted more like an old-fashioned letter.  It was written with forethought and, more importantly, with heart.  Most emails I get have little to no heart!  There were a couple more exchanges with the email writer.  That could have been the end of the matter.  And that would have been pretty good.

            I am not the kind of person content to leave it at that.  I am curious.  And so I did what I always am trying to get students to do: be curious and then act on the curiosity.  Since Google answers everything, I typed in the name of the person who had sent the email.  She was the first one to pop up.  Suddenly and serendipitously, I was introduced to some forty years of history with this person.  She is actually a big name in her field and I had no clue.  Surprisingly, there are a couple places where her work and my work touch each other, but again I did not know it.  I have interests in multiple areas, although some of them I have not pursued in any depth.  She occupied one of those areas.

            The more I read, the more I felt drawn to pursue this.  Clearly, she is a gifted, thoughtful person who has had a clarity of vision for a long time and has acted on that---such an admirable quality.  Because of the blessings of technology, I could see what she looked like and even know how she sounds.  She is no longer simply the anonymous sender of a nice email.  She has become a person.  Not only that, she has become of a person with breadth, depth and a big dose of the Spirit.  I have learned all that…and I have never met her or talked to her in real life.

            But I will.  Because I see the work of the Spirit here, I intend to pursue it.  I don’t know where the Spirit is leading, but that is not important right now.  Serendipity has given me a gift; now is time for me to multiple the grace of the gift.  It is like the story Jesus told about being given a treasure.  Don’t just sit on it.  Leverage it, as my business buddy would say.  Multiply those loaves so you can feed more than anyone thought possible. 

            There is no master plan here.  Most early relationships do not begin with a roadmap.  In fact my intent to pursue this relationship does not even have a destination.  I have no clue what or where “there” is.  But that does not matter.  This is more mystery than anything else.  To be in mystery with the Spirit is sufficient for me.  I am not in control anyway.  I can initiate, but not control.  I can respond in relationship without regulating.  I can experiment without piling on expectations.

            I call this gift relational serendipity.  I can only nurture it if I am intentional, but open.  Having said that, I know it requires as much responsiveness from me as it does my intentionality.  The good news is I am free going into it, as is the other person.  I am not looking for anything particular.  But I am open to what unfolds.  We both are part of the evolutionary work of the Spirit.  I want to see what emerges.  Emergence is the language of how this Spirit lures us into the future with God and others.

            Of course, now I am theologizing about something that initially was simply an experience---and experience of serendipity.  I have turned this moment of serendipity into something more comprehensive and global.  But is that not the way God is at work in our world?  Usually divine serendipity occurs and appears in apparently innocuous moments.  These can become serendipity moments and, in my case, the beginning of relational serendipity

            When grace comes, say yes and start to enjoy the mystery of it all.

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