Thoughts on Comfort

It was just another Sunday to join a Quaker community in worship.  I have been doing that my whole life.  Some Quakers meet in silence, like Quakers of old.  Other Quakers were influenced by their Christian neighbors in the nineteenth century and developed a worship experience more like a typical Protestant experience.  I am quite fine with both types.  I learned a long time ago that the Spirit can be present in either type and can be absent.  I prefer to go to a community where the Spirit is more likely to be welcomed and embraced.  

I was about to say, I went to meeting for worship, as we call it, not expecting anything special.  But that is not quite true.  I go to every meeting for worship expecting it can be special in some fashion.  That is part of the mystery of the endeavor.  You can never be sure to whom or how the Spirit will speak.  Of course, it does not always seem that special when I look back on the experience, but it is still good.  I keep going.  It is important to me.

During that particular worship experience, someone shared some words from Paul which he included in his letter to the church at Corinth.  Early in II Corinthians Paul is talking about the recent troubles and consternations between him and some from that congregation.  It is easy to forget he is writing about a time barely a quarter of a century from when Jesus has been killed.  And Corinth is in Greece, miles across the Mediterranean Sea from Jerusalem.  Much has happened.

Let’s first look at Paul’s words to the Corinthians.  In that first chapter, Paul has the usual introduction.  Then Paul tells the Christians at Corinth that God is the one “who consoles us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to console those who are in any affliction with the consolation with which we ourselves are consoled by God.”  He assures them that their “consolation is abundant through Christ.”  He adds, “If we are being afflicted, it is for your consolation and salvation; if we are being consoled, it is for your consolation.”  Finally, he asks that they “share in our consolation.” (II Cor 1:4-7). This translation is from the NRSV.  The NIV translation uses the word, “comfort,” instead of the consolation language of the NRSV.

I will spare you the Greek word behind these English words.  Instead, I am intrigued with the idea of comfort.  I am sure most folks think they know exactly what the word means.  And likely, they are correct.  But most have not thought very deeply about it.  Hence, I would like to offer a couple of these thoughts.

To begin with, I think comfort is an issue in times of problems or predicaments.  When folks experience trouble, comfort is needed.  Regularly, I offered comfort in my visits to hospitals and nursing homes.  Being laid off from work, a death in the family are all occasions for comfort.  I am sure in many instances the comfort that is offered is welcome and it makes a difference.

But I am also confident that comfort does not necessarily fix the trouble, problem or difficulty.  Obviously, comfort does not bring someone back to life.  It seldom undoes a layoff or loss of a job.  It does not reverse the divorce process and so on.  And so, I tell folks comfort is not magic.  I like magic.  It is fun and entertaining.  But I also know magic is not real.  It deals in illusion and sleight of hand.  Even if I don’t know how the magician did the trick, I know it is a trick.  Comfort is not a trick.  It does not fix things.  God also is not a magician.

I do think, however, comfort can be a miracle.  I do believe in miracles.  Although I may not be able to explain a miracle either, somehow it is real.   A miracle is not a trick.  Comfort is like that.  When I offer comfort, it does not normally take away the sadness surrounding the trouble.  Comforting a woman whose husband has just died does not lead to smiles or applause, as magic does.  But it is comfort; it is welcome, and it can make a difference.

I think comfort is always a gift.  No one earns or even deserves comfort.  But when comfort comes, it is welcome and it makes being in trouble, in despair, in disbelief easier to cope with and begin to get on with life.  To be given comfort means someone cares and is in it with you.  That means a great deal.  

Comfort comes in different forms.  Often it is not a big deal.  It can be a few words.  It might be nothing more than a hug, a smile or some other non-verbal communication.  Comfort communicates that you are present with and for the other person.  Comfort is the promise of community.  It symbolizes you are not ignored or alone.  Powerfully, it communicates care, when those who need comfort often feel like no one cares at all.  

Much more could be said, but I close with the suggestion that comfort is soulful.  To give comfort is soul work.  It is a gift of my deep self to you.  And if I do it in the Spirit, it is also a gift of God’s deep self.  That is miraculous!