I would like to have a dollar for every time I have heard someone refer to the “good old days.” Usually, it is someone with some age on him or her. I suspect young folks are not quite old enough to spend much time in memory. They are too busy crafting their futures and enjoying the present. Besides, they have not accumulated that many “old days!” I happen to be at the age where there are more old days than days to come. And I am ok with that.
Typically, the phrase, the good old days, is mentioned with some wistfulness. When we make that reference, we are temporarily through our memories re-located back in that very time. By definition it is a pleasant time. No one thinks of sickness or tragedy in their lives and talks about those as the good old days. This probably explains why people like the mental trip back to the good old days. They were always days that we cherish.
Normally the reference to the good old days is making a comparison to the current moment. “Back then” somehow was better or more pleasant. We probably are making a comment on our current time and experience---and this usually does not come off well in comparison.
Often this comment on the good old days is a self-referring comment. We are not necessarily including others in this backward looking. For example, I am not a fairly committed walker. But it could be normal to think about the days when I was a runner---indeed, a marathon runner---as the good old days. It probably would sound like I am complaining a bit or, at least, saying “back then” was somehow better or preferable. I would say that I loved running. I liked how it made me feel. I liked the self-image that came from that activity. But I am ok being in a new phase in life.
I realize we cannot live our lives in the past. No matter how good the “good old days” were, they are over, except for memory. Trying to re-create or repeat those days inevitably leads to failure. Oh, I could actually run yet today. But it would not be like it was back then. I would not like that self-image of me as runner. It is no longer who I am.
My job as a human being is to be the very best person I can be in this present moment. And this will be my life-project for as much future as I have. Spending time in the good old days only distracts and delays my current project of living well. I have never thought about it in these terms, but we could say that our present task is to live so well, we are actually creating days that soon enough will, through memory, become good old days.
I know for certain, if I don’t pay attention to the moment, I will waste it or make too little of it. Every time we claim to be bored or too busy, we are declaring that we are not fully engaged and are not making the most of the moment. There is no way this will become one of those good old days. How do we live today, so that this day has a chance of becoming a “good old day?”
I think it begins with being aware. I know this sounds trite, but without awareness, there is little chance (unless we are lucky) today will become memorable. We probably think we are aware, but normally we live more robotically that we think. What we call routine can be little more than going through the motions. So we can work on being more aware.
The second thing is to cultivate some gratitude. Are we aware of how gifted we are each day and multiply throughout that day? Our very life is gift. How often do we say thank you for the gift of our life? We can be grateful to the others who pass through our day. When we are aware, we can begin to notice how many folks are making it easier and better for us. Most of us can’t get along by ourselves every day. A little thank you helps create a good day.
A third thing that helps is some humility. People with big egos and arrogant folks usually have expectations set too high really to enjoy what is happening in the moment in each day. These folks are too ready with their complaints and seldom become resources of gratitude. While they are getting all they want, too often they are making life miserable for others in their circle. Even when they win or succeed, they may be unhappy.
I am confident everything being discussed here applies to my spiritual experience and life. And it probably is very good advice to give ourselves the best chance to have days, spiritually speaking, that have a chance to become a good old day. Being aware, being grateful and being humble are key ingredients to a healthy spiritual life. In fact, being spiritual should cultivate these characteristics.
My goal is to live today in the hope tomorrow it can be remembered as a good old day.
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