My daughter recently had a baby. In this case it is good news. The baby is very lucky compared to other babies around the world who were born on the same day. This baby is wanted. Not all babies are. This baby will get the advantage, not only of parents who care about it and will love him, but parents who have enough money to provide good food, shelter and all the rest. Not all babies will have that deal. My grandson will also be advantaged in that genetically he probably is above average intellectually and will have the additional advantage of good schools. Effectively, the kid has it made and doesn’t know it!
But all this is not predestination. My grandson can still blow it. He can grow up and not take advantage of his advantages. He can squander this treasure of possibility. He can be irresponsible. And his more disadvantaged counterparts may well rise above what you might have expected. Many of them will find ways to excel, when we might have expected them to fail. Truly, they are heroes of their own stories.
In the midst of all this higher level discussion, there is one basic issue that fascinates me. I call it the naming game. When a baby is born, the question for parents (and anyone else allowed into the game) is: what are we going to name the child? Some parents think long and hard before the birth and are ready to name the little one immediately upon birth. Others---like my daughter---wait. Some wait to get a sense of the personality of the new little creature. Somehow there is the sense that a name has to “fit” the new person. I get this, but I am not sure I understand it.
While we wait for a name for the baby, it gets a little awkward. Of course, we know the biological sex. We can easily call the newborn girl “her” and “she.” But these are pronouns. They need a noun---a name. I understand parents who use family names---like being named for the sweet grandfather who just passed away. There may be other rules. For example, all the women/girls in my immediate family share the same middle name. Not to name a baby girl in my family with that middle name would be tantamount to breaking the rules.
So what’s in a name? I am sure there are secular ways to answer this question. And there are also religious ways to deal with it. If we know anything about the Christian bible, we know something about the significance of naming and of names. It would take too much space to reference all the “naming” incidents in the Hebrew bible. Often the word (name) itself is meaningful. For example, in Hebrew Adam means “earth” and Eve means “life.” We know that Abram received a new name as he began to become the father of the chosen people. Abram became Abraham.
And when we turn to the New Testament, it is similar. Even people unfamiliar with the details of New Testament, may know that Saul became Paul. There are good reasons for this name change. Paul was a different person than Saul. The naming game is not just a biblical thing. When I began to learn about monks, I learned that they received a new name when they joined the monastery and made their vows. Again a good example is my favorite monk, Thomas Merton. That was his name in the world. When he made vows at the Abbey of Gethsemani, he became “Louis.” In the beginning he was Brother Louis. After he was ordained, it was Father Louis.
Sometimes we chose a name because it means something. It might have its own meaning in English, such as the name Precious. Or the name might have a special meaning in another language---often the language of our forebears. One of my girls is named Felicity, which means “happiness” in Latin. Some kids grow up liking their names. Other kids don’t like their name at all.
Names identify. This means names are deeply tied up with who we are. Some would contend that we are nobodies until we get a name. Names distinguish and differentiate. We become somebody. As I think about it, I wonder if naming and identity go both ways? Names do distinguish and differentiate. But we develop as humans and we give substance to our name. Think about how many people have the same name---Mary, Thomas, etc. But individuals give substance to the “Mary she is.” We become “that Mary.”
To add one more piece to the reflection. I think the person and the name can grow together. Names can become special as the person becomes special. And a name can be soured by association with someone who made it sour. Names are not sacred, but people are sacred. This is what I look forward to watching as my new grandson begins to become a person and to take on and then “fill out” his name.
It shapes him in the beginning. But soon he will give it the shape that name will have for him.
But all this is not predestination. My grandson can still blow it. He can grow up and not take advantage of his advantages. He can squander this treasure of possibility. He can be irresponsible. And his more disadvantaged counterparts may well rise above what you might have expected. Many of them will find ways to excel, when we might have expected them to fail. Truly, they are heroes of their own stories.
In the midst of all this higher level discussion, there is one basic issue that fascinates me. I call it the naming game. When a baby is born, the question for parents (and anyone else allowed into the game) is: what are we going to name the child? Some parents think long and hard before the birth and are ready to name the little one immediately upon birth. Others---like my daughter---wait. Some wait to get a sense of the personality of the new little creature. Somehow there is the sense that a name has to “fit” the new person. I get this, but I am not sure I understand it.
While we wait for a name for the baby, it gets a little awkward. Of course, we know the biological sex. We can easily call the newborn girl “her” and “she.” But these are pronouns. They need a noun---a name. I understand parents who use family names---like being named for the sweet grandfather who just passed away. There may be other rules. For example, all the women/girls in my immediate family share the same middle name. Not to name a baby girl in my family with that middle name would be tantamount to breaking the rules.
So what’s in a name? I am sure there are secular ways to answer this question. And there are also religious ways to deal with it. If we know anything about the Christian bible, we know something about the significance of naming and of names. It would take too much space to reference all the “naming” incidents in the Hebrew bible. Often the word (name) itself is meaningful. For example, in Hebrew Adam means “earth” and Eve means “life.” We know that Abram received a new name as he began to become the father of the chosen people. Abram became Abraham.
And when we turn to the New Testament, it is similar. Even people unfamiliar with the details of New Testament, may know that Saul became Paul. There are good reasons for this name change. Paul was a different person than Saul. The naming game is not just a biblical thing. When I began to learn about monks, I learned that they received a new name when they joined the monastery and made their vows. Again a good example is my favorite monk, Thomas Merton. That was his name in the world. When he made vows at the Abbey of Gethsemani, he became “Louis.” In the beginning he was Brother Louis. After he was ordained, it was Father Louis.
Sometimes we chose a name because it means something. It might have its own meaning in English, such as the name Precious. Or the name might have a special meaning in another language---often the language of our forebears. One of my girls is named Felicity, which means “happiness” in Latin. Some kids grow up liking their names. Other kids don’t like their name at all.
Names identify. This means names are deeply tied up with who we are. Some would contend that we are nobodies until we get a name. Names distinguish and differentiate. We become somebody. As I think about it, I wonder if naming and identity go both ways? Names do distinguish and differentiate. But we develop as humans and we give substance to our name. Think about how many people have the same name---Mary, Thomas, etc. But individuals give substance to the “Mary she is.” We become “that Mary.”
To add one more piece to the reflection. I think the person and the name can grow together. Names can become special as the person becomes special. And a name can be soured by association with someone who made it sour. Names are not sacred, but people are sacred. This is what I look forward to watching as my new grandson begins to become a person and to take on and then “fill out” his name.
It shapes him in the beginning. But soon he will give it the shape that name will have for him.
Comments
Post a Comment