As Americans, we enter the
Thanksgiving season. Already people are
wishing me a “happy Thanksgiving.” I am
delighted with that greeting. And I
would be delighted if someone next week wishes me a “happy Monday.” But I guess Mondays are supposed to be
normal…not so happy, not so awful.
I am not sure I do major
holidays very well. I am not against
them. They celebrate important events in
national, religious, and often personal lives.
Thanksgiving is an American deal.
In Turkey it is just another weekday!
As an American, I welcome it. And
I hope it is happy.
I am confident one of the
reasons I am not sure about major holidays is the trickiness of
expectations. For example, Thanksgiving
is supposed to be “happy.” Christmas is
supposed to be “merry” and, of course, we return to the “happy” theme for New
Years. Clearly, for too many people
there are too many lousy things going on to gear up to be “happy” and
“merry.” Holiday expectations are tricky
things.
The truth is Thanksgiving
lasts one day. It is here and it is
gone. Even if one adds “Black Friday,”
that is only two days. Since I am not a
shopper and, certainly, not a shop-till-I-drop person, Friday is not part of
the deal. No one ever has wished me a “Happy
Black Friday!”
I am glad Thanksgiving is
here. And I am glad it is one day and
then it is over till another year. And I
hope I am happy…and you, too.
In reality I am more
interested in how Thanksgiving can become a way of life. In fact, I think we should not capitalize
it. I want my way of life to be one of
thanksgiving. That gets me at the
spiritual roots of my life and how I want those roots to issue a way of life for
which I can say, “thanks.” And I hope my
way of life becomes such that others can say, “thank you.”
Both those qualities are
necessary for my understanding of thanksgiving as a way of life. I need to be able to say, “thanks,” and to
have others respond genuinely with their “thank you.” If I am only concerned with a way of life for
which I give “thanks,” I fear it may be a way of life rooted in
self-interest. If I get all I want, then
I will be thankful. But some of what I
might want may come at the expense of others.
And surely, they are not going to say, “thank you.”
On the other hand, if I
live only to get your “thank you,” I may be nothing more than your servant or,
worse, doormat! You happily say, “thank
you,” but I certainly am not saying, “thanks.”
The good news is that kind
of thanksgiving is a way of life. I don’t
have to pull it off by the weekend. Like
music or sports, I will probably have to practice a fair amount. There is time. Perhaps, the real question is not whether I
am succeeding, but am I making progress?
How will I know if I am making progress? Likely, there are many ways to measure it,
but let me offer two. I will be making
progress if I am more loving---more loving than I was last week and last
Thanksgiving. Sometimes that is not
easy---there are so many ding-a-lings out there! And of course, most people are not as
loveable as I am!
The second measure is if I
am more graceful. I am not thinking of
gymnasts and ballerinas. Grace is always
a gift. If I am more graceful, I am more
giving---perhaps, more forgiving. If I
can be more graceful, more giving, then people are more likely to say, “thank
you.”
This is the last inspirational journey until Monday after Thanksgiving.
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