I am part of
a group that meets weekly. It is a great
group of fairly diverse people. The
folks have a variety of jobs. Both
genders are represented. The age range
is significant. Some are retired and
others are newer into their careers. Not everyone has the same religious
background. We have Christians and Jews
and some who probably are not institutionally affiliated. But the greatest thing about the group is how
well they get along.
I like being
part of a community. Usually, I can tell
if a group is a community or if they are just a collection of individuals. They may even be working to some common end,
but a collection of individuals will not automatically become a community. I am pretty sure I cannot give you an
academic definition of community. But I
do know there are some key aspects.
Community
requires commitment from the various members.
Typically, the community members have voluntary membership in the
group. No one made them join up or even
stay with the community. Clearly there
has to be mutual respect. I have already
indicated that communities do not have to be uniform or homogeneous. There can be some significant diversity in
communities as long as there is mutual respect.
Respect is different than agreement.
In fact, there may be some people with whom I agree, but do not
necessarily respect.
I think
authentic community expect the most from each member without presupposing that
everyone is perfect. Authentic
communities have to find a way to understand and deal with the fact that
occasionally some within the community will fail. It might be a failure of omission---someone
failed to do what he or she said would be done.
It might be a failure of commission---someone tried to be or do
something and did not pull it off. These
two kinds of failure---failing to do and failing in what you actually do---are
both failure. The question is what to do
with people who fail?
One obvious
option is excommunication---banning the person.
If you fail, you are tossed out of the group. Another option is probation of some
sort. This is milder than
excommunication, but still holds a threat.
Probation says, in effect, you are on trial---you are on notice. Shape up or you will be shipped out of the
group. Probation brings a certain kind
of pressure. If I am on probation, it is
my choice whether to stay with the community and try to get back into the
graces of the community. But there is
pressure.
A third
option for people who fail is forgiveness.
In this case the community recognizes there was failure, but extends
forgiveness. Of course, everyone who has
ever thought about forgiveness makes the point that forgiveness is not the same
thing as forgetting. Forgiveness is a
fully conscious choice not to hold something against the person who
failed. Obviously, forgiveness usually
presupposes some sense of remorse, some apology, some admission from the one
who failed. Forgiveness is not the same
thing as saying, “oh, it does not matter.”
Forgiveness says, “it matters, but we forgive you anyway.”
For me
community has been an important laboratory of the spiritual life. Not every community of which I have been a
participant has been a spiritual community.
That’s ok, because even a non-spiritual community teaches me something
about life in a spiritual community. So
what kind of laboratory is community?
A spiritual
community is a laboratory of love. This
is not the sappy kind of love, but the real love of life together. It is the love that demands that I do my part
and love others in the process. It is a
laboratory of love that asks me to set aside self-interest in the interests of
others and, particularly, the community.
It is a laboratory of love that expects me to put the group ahead of my
own self-interests. Yes, the group is
more important than I am! That is
counter-cultural in America today.
A spiritual
community is a laboratory of hope. It is
a place where the hope of the group (often expressed as the goal or mission of
the group) feeds the individual hopes of each member. Jesus called this hope the Kingdom. I might call it the Blessed Community. Again, it is bigger than I am. It helps me transcend my own petty hopes and
dreams. It makes me a part of something
bigger, something more important, and something significant.
I am grateful
for my little gang. I am grateful they
include me. They are going to take me
places I could never go on my on. They
may even take me to the place where I can pray, “thy kingdom come,” and it
will! Blessed be community!
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