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To Believe or Not To Believe

I became involved yesterday in a conversation about believing.  It was a cordial discussion between some folks who have a firm belief that God exists and somehow is involved in the world in a caring way.  Another couple of people were dubious about God’s existence.  They were not wildly opposed to God’s existence.  Rather, they simply felt like they have had no evidence that God exists.  They do not see any signs of a God who is involved in any kind of caring way.

Rationally, both sides make sense to me.  I think I could easily develop an argument for both of those sides that could convince me.  But sometimes the issue of God’s existence is not just a “matter of the head.”  To say that is to say perhaps coming to believe or disbelieve in God’s existence is not a matter of just figuring it out.

Of course, I do believe in a God who exists.  And I am just as certain I have no compelling evidence to prove that existence to someone who has seen no signs of Divine existence.  That is why I am content to see it as an issue of faith.  Given my experience, I “trust” that God exists.  I cannot prove it, but that is ok.

Then I recalled some words I read some years ago.  They are relevant to this reflection.  “Physician and author Richard Selzer, a renowned advocate of more humanistically oriented medical-student education” was asked about his faith in God.  His answer made me simultaneously chuckle and feel the depth of his answer.

Selzer says, “My entire life has been one long search for faith. I haven’t found it. I do not believe in God.”  That is very clear.  A rabid atheist could say the very same thing.  However, Selzer is not a rabid atheist.  Instead, I sense a depth of feeling that I appreciate.

He continues by saying that “I want you to know that I love the idea of God.  I love piety.”  I am touched by that sentiment.  Instead of asserting that belief in God is utter nonsense, Selzer confesses that he loves the idea of God.  And that is just the point.  He has an “idea” of God…but he knows that is not God.  I have an idea of a unicorn, but that does not mean the unicorn exists.

I sense the feeling-tone of Selzer’s words when he says that he loves piety.  When I hear those words, I realize I do not actually love piety.  Honestly, I don’t like piety very much!   I need to reconsider this and my own prejudice about things like that.  I thank my atheist friend!

Finally, Selzer arrests me with his words about believing in God.  He says, “Without it, you lead your life unmoored, in a state of isolation.  You are a tiny speck in a vast universe.  I’m jealous, frankly.  I feel as though I’ve missed out on the greatest thing that can happen to a person—faith in God.  It must be wonderful.”  As I read these words, I am deeply touched.  Selzer articulates the key reason my own belief is satisfying.

Belief can moor one’s life.  Without that, one can feel isolated.  Of course, we can be with others; but in faith one can be united into a body of believers.  That is powerful.  It makes me thankful to be able to be present with others who share a similar belief.  It does not matter to me that we may not believe exactly in the same God.  I figure God is not capable of fully being defined.  God is more than whatever I think and I am good with that.

I am not sure I have a sense that faith in God is the greatest thing that can happen to a person.  Somehow I feel like I have come up short.  I believe, but perhaps not with the requisite passion.  Maybe I need to go back to my faith beginning and turn up the heat a little.

I thank Selzer for reminding me of what I have.  And now I want to have it with more passion and more permission to be joyous.

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