It is doubtlessly true that nearly all of us have experienced some anxiety in our lives at some time. Some of us are probably predisposed to be anxious more of the time. Some of us are predictably anxious. By that I mean, there are times or occasions when we are probably going to be anxious. It could be before a doctor’s appointment, right before an exam, when we have to speak public ally and so on. I suspect that some of this anxiety is normal. Clearly, athletes will talk about butterflies before the game begins. Like butterflies, anxiety typically wanes, once we are engaged with or beyond that which made us anxious.
I certainly know I have been anxious. Maybe I am even one of those who has been more anxious than the situation would have merited. No doubt, I have done it myself. And likely, others have helped the process. I suspect that as a parent, I may have added some anxiety to my kids, when it was not necessary. We put pressure on folks and, then, wonder why they are anxious!
Hence, I think some anxiety is probably a given. Even if someone tells us not to be anxious, we go there anyway. So I am interested in how we might constructively deal with anxiety. Furthermore, I wonder whether there are some spiritual gleanings we can take away from our encounter with anxiety. If we are going to experience anxiety, can be spiritually grow from that experience?
Let’s begin with an insightful quotation from Jodi Picoult. She describes anxiety this way: “Anxiety’s like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn’t get you very far.” Like me, you probably smiled or almost laughed out loud. Yep, that’s anxiety! It does feel like things are happenings, but there is nothing good to show from it.
Thinking about anxiety leads me to realize that it is an emotional response to a perceived threat. I understand “threat” may be a strong word here, but I contend it is appropriate. If there were no threat---at least a mild threat, there would be nothing at stake and I would not be anxious. Even if it is like butterflies before the important soccer match, the threat is I won’t perform acceptably---I may blow it and fall on my face. Furthermore, the threat has to be imminent---it is upon me. I don’t get anxious about a speech a year from now. An hour from now? Yep!
If we look more closely at anxiety itself, a couple things seem obvious. Anxiety is anticipatory by nature. I don’t get anxious about things in the past. It is the future---the near future that makes me anxious. It normally hits me as a form of worry. I worry about what the doctor will tell me. I am anxious. I don’t worry about appointments two months away.
The anxiety is a concern about something imminent and, even more, concern about the consequences. I don’t worry about sure things. There has to be something at stake. Typically, I don’t feel in control---even though I may actually be. From the study on anxiety that I have done, scholars, like Joseph Ledoux, tell us that anxiety is something like one-third genetics. That does not get me off the hook for the other two-thirds. So I can really only blame my parents for less than half of it!
Now that we have a general understanding of anxiety, the important question is what we can do about it. I like the words of the early Chinese philosopher and strategist., Sun Tzu. He notes that “In the midst of chaos, there is also opportunity.” We take this to mean in the middle of anxiety can be found opportunity. There are some spiritual gleanings. Let’s look at a couple.
The first thing anxiety teaches me is I am not fully in control. Anxiety makes me feel vulnerable. Whether it is true or not, I feel like I might get hurt. I know I like to be in control. But I also know there are things in life I don’t control. One spiritual gleaning from anxiety is to see it as a chance to grow in a deeper understanding of life. I know that control is often related to the issue of trust. Furthermore, trust also means faith in my vocabulary. Anxiety is a faith opportunity, to cite Sun Tzu. It is an opportunity to learn more about faith and to grow in my faithfulness. I might get hurt, but I want to have the faith to grow from the experience. Theologically, I know how much growth is possible from suffering. From anxiety I want to learn more about faith and marry it with courage.
The second thing anxiety teaches me is about resilience. To be resilient means to bounce back. Resilient people get knocked down, but they managed to get back up. I know life will knock me down from time to time. That is not the question. The question is whether I can be back up and get back with it? Again, I have read quite a bit of scholarship on resilience. I know things like having a moral compass, having spiritual grounding and having social support are key factors in becoming resilient. But knowing things does not automatically translate into practice. That is where the spiritual growth comes.
Resilience is not simply an idea. It is a lived experience. And so it is with spirituality. Spirituality is not a bunch of neat ideas. It is a lived experience in the presence of the Spirit. It is realizing life is not perfect. I may get hurt. I may well be anxious. But I can learn and grow. That is what I have gleaned.
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